My Own Ted Lasso

There are very few people in this world I ever considered a mentor, and last night I lost my friend and mentor Tom Black.

Mark, Tom Black, Me circa 1980

He was one of my agriculture teachers, but we stayed in touch over the years. We didn’t see eye-to-eye on everything later in life, but he was good to me, invested in me, and taught me a lot. What little self-esteem I have, I learned from him. In every imaginable way, he was a safe place.

When my high school job got cut, he immediately offered me my own landscaping crew, hoping I’d take it and start my own business. I went back to grad school instead… but I still wonder sometimes how life would’ve been different.

Tom believed in me, and he believed in my music. He was always a fan, always glad to hear me play and sing. I don’t even know if it was ever truly his kind of music, but it didn’t matter. He never made it about his taste. He made it about believing in me… and about me learning to believe in myself.

I always wanted to make Tom proud of me. I hope I did. I think I did — not because I became some big success, but because I kept becoming more fully myself.

In some ways, he was my own Ted Lasso.